Why wait, when you can ...

When you look at this poster, how does you feel? Some people may think that this movie is all about dancing and the great moves the main actress can portray. Some people may think it is a movie of a famous dancer and her career. Everyone has their own opinions about the poster, but the truth remains the same in the movie.

Lauryn is the main actress who comes from Indiana to Chicago to pursue her dream as a dancer in a famous school. She leaves her brother, Joel and her family business to fulfill her dream. Unexpectedly, she fails terribly in the first audition of her dream school. Lauryn's miserable and sorrow feelings are exposed to a waitress at a diner name Dana. They both get to know each other and Dana invites Lauryn to stay over at her apartment until she can sort things out. Before Lauryn realizes, she is already into the dancing at a club where Dana works at night. It is a great opportunity for Lauryn to get over her stage fright and to practice exploring her dancing moves. This golden chance allows Lauryn to discover new move and spices to enrich her dancing when she tries for the second audition at her school.

What is extremely important about this movie is that Lauryn represents her own individual decision and not let her brother's opinion or the teachers from her dream school affect her decision in striving for her dance career. When it comes to individual decision making, Lauryn has simple decisions with clear rationale, and she knows that she has the expertise and talent for dancing. She is confident and trust her ability to perform. With such a strong determination and persitence, she is confident enough to overcome group pressure. Clearly in this movie, Lauryn did manage to make her way through when one of her co-workers tries to push Lauryn out of her dancing at the club. In the end, Lauryn did overcome this obstacle with one specific goal on her mind- to become a real dancer. Even with group pressure or peer pressure, Lauryn still maintains her strength to get through it and become successful.

Can you imagine what would happen if Lauryn follows her brother's opinion and some of her workers that she cannot achieve her goal? First of all, the movie will not have existed if she just follows along with what other people says. While people may perceive Lauryn's dream as impossible to achieve, but she demonstrates to us that if a person strongly believesin himself or herself, nothing is impossible. A strong individual goal is needed for a person to achieve his or own goal.

Be yourself and speak up for what you believe is right

Throughout my high school year, many friends and classmates bond together through common interests, hobbies and goals. While everyone may get along with each other well, it may not be the case for everyone. Most new students tend to go along with the rest in aiming to fit in for the first year in the new school. On the surface, it may look like everything is going on well. One incident happened during my junior year, this new girl stood up for herself in a conversation with her friends about afterschool activities. To the new girl, the afterschool activities were a waste of time because she saw that most of her friends use the excuse of staying afterschool to go out of schools. Although some people did do afterschool activities, most of the people she hung out with did not do that. Everyday, her friends would drag her to the malls, to movies, to arcade games, to bowling, to the beach or to drink alcohol at each other's house. To her, it was really a big waste of time. Though she tried to go along for a few months, she was fed up and decided to drop out of the group. This is a real life example of groupthink.

It is undeniable that group communication exist in all society, but to some extent, individuals should have their own voices instead of following their groups. An astounding example is demonstrated in this video link (http://www.crmlearning.com/groupthink-2nd-edition). This video clearly suggests that groupthink requires courage and strong confident in every individual. If not, a catastrophic consequence is expected.

Some people may fear to speak up their opinions just because they feel it may be silly or incorrect statement. This fear allows the majority to dominate the decision-making. Group socialisation is a situation where the individuals and the group seek to influence each other to best meet their needs. While it may be good to listen to other people's suggestion and opinion, it is even more important to have your OWN opinion and thought. If individuals could speak up for important decisions such as during the Bay of Pigs invasion, Pearl Harbor and the Cuban Missile Crisis, million of lives could have been saved.

Interpersonal Communication

Communication is extremely crucial in daily life. When we can communicate the right information to another person, it will enhance the relationship between one another. What would happen if two people cannot communicate properly and cause misunderstanding?

Simple misunderstandings can, possibly, be best outcomes of any miscommunication. However, more than often, miscommunication can result in something more serious and threaten the very existence of the relationship between the sender and receiver.

Let’s look at a scenario. You were the C.E.O. of a company, and one of your employees, not only was late for work, but he also handed you an incomplete business report. His excuse was he had a bad weekend and he had to take care of some other tasks as well. Frustrated and angered by his disorganization and lack of devotion to your company, you quickly interrupted his continuous excuses for everything. Then you told him to get out of your office and clean out his desk by that afternoon.

From your perspective, you attribute his inability to perform at his highest level as the result of bad time management and inconsistency. However, what if the employee had a legitimate excuse for this action and you did not give him a chance to fully explain himself? Rather than his incapability, the task was incomplete because his colleagues at the company did not fully contribute in finishing the report. Therefore, as the group leader, he had to accept all responsibilities. This difference in your interpretation of why your employee was unsuccessful in completing the work is based on the attribution theory, suggesting that you strive to understand the causes of events around you in order to make appropriate responses. However, when you misinterpret and misunderstand the event, attribution can influence you to make a wrong response (Allred, 2000)[1]

This is just one of the many examples of how miscommunication can lead to the deterioration or, in this case, the termination of a relationship. This happens every day in our lives. Sometimes we quickly get angry and refuse to reason with the other person. Not only we jeopardize the relationship, but we also practice bad communication skills. By the way, this employee was the best worker in your company. Not only you were mad at the wrong person, you had fired one of your company’s greatest assets.

I find that we live in two different worlds each day: the first world is what we called home and the second one is anywhere outside of our home. It is interesting how I—hopefully everyone feel the same way—expect information in full details in the second world while only demanding less at home. Part of the reason for these differences is my family is very high context. We communicate less verbally. I always assume and hope that my parents can understand of what I want to tell them. On the other hand, sometimes it is hard for my friends and classmates to understand me because of my low verbally explicit communication.

I, finally, came to a conclusion that conflicts and misunderstanding are unavoidable. The most important thing we should all remember is how to manage them. Good conflict management skills can help us avoid unnecessary conflicts, and good communication skills can enhance our productivity and our quality of life.

[1] Miller, C. W., Roloff, M. E., & Malis, R. S. (2007). Understanding Interpersonal Conflicts That Are Difficult to Resolve: A Review of Literature and Presentation of an Integrated Model. In C. S. Beck (Ed.), Communication Yearbook (pp. 118-171). Lawrence Erlbaum Association, 118-159.

Is it a Right or Wrong Perception?

For many years, women were and are perceived as more inferior to men in regardless of status, job rank and ability to perform certain tasks. Whether you are a woman in Cambodia or India, you are still treated differently compare to men. Most women including myself always wonder whether it is fair to receive certain treatment just because of our gender.


Since I was young, my relatives and grandmother always told me that girls do not need to be highly educated. I have always wondered why they never stop my brothers from reaching for higher level of education. To my grandmother, she always encourages my brothers to get a doctrate degree so that they can be a specialist in one area that they like. Why can't I do the same thing? I have always wanted to be a teacher and I have some passion for it. However, I was told not to go overseas to further my studies. Five years ago, my grandmother and aunts stopped me from going to the US because they felt that there is no need for me to study that much. They always say that I will eventually marry, become a mother and a housewife. At that time, I told them that I wanted to explore the world and do not want to limit myself to certain levels they were trying to set for me. My parents were supportive and let me further my education in America and Singapore.

I must admit that my grandmother's perception of girls is that they do not require high education since it is unnecessary. I do want to change her mindset and perception because girls should have the same opportunity to experience and learn new things as boys do. The traditional Cambodian perception of girls is exactly the same as in Indian society before. Women are always be inferior to men and always remain as a housewife regardless of how much education she could achieve. Personally, I think it is extremely unfair and untrue because girls can achieve the same level as success as boys do if she is willing to do so. People should not judge the ability based on gender.

Communicating without knowing it

Since young, I always feel that it is better to tell my parents everything that occurs in my life. I trust my parents and I know that they will always support me in whichever decision I make. There are times when it is extremely hard to verbally communicate to them about my feelings. The death of my grandfather had a great impact tremendously in my life. Through I came across many emotional thoughts and feelings, I never communicate to anyone about it. Many times, I found myself feeling regretful and depressed. The good memories of him flash back to me everyday. In such situation, I can not verbally communicate to my parents or anyone else. It is too complicated and indescribable.

Unexpectedly, my parents and friends do comprehend my feelings toward my grandfather’s death. I never know that I express any communication to them about my feelings. Through my silences and facial expressions, my parents understand how sad I feel. Likewise, many of us may overlook the importance of this non-verbal communication. While most people including myself tends to believe that verbal communication is among the best communication because one person can hear the exact feelings and thoughts of another person, it may not be entirely true.

As shown in the recent movie, Wall-E, the main character clearly demonstrates that non-verbal communication is just as good and as effective as verbal communication. The main character, Wally, is a lonely robot. He cleans up trashes everyday after everyone in the world evacuated to space. This film is fast forward to 700 years from now with a belief that the world is going to be destroyed and filled with pollutions. At the same time, the movie is projecting that people are shifting to space where they can enjoy the luxury lives they used to have on earth.

Wally communicates nonverbally with a wide range of emotions using his hands, and facial expressions. This allows the audiences to realize that verbal is not necessarily needed when Wally demonstrates his emotions effectively without having to say much. This new movie is just one example to show that non-verbal communication is just as effective as verbal communication. In some situations, non-verbal communication is much stronger in conveying a message.

Personally, I do feel that both type of communication are useful and need to be co-existed. My own reason is that, verbal communication does not always allow individual to maintain privacy. For instance, anyone can eavesdrop or accidentally hear a communication between two people at anytime. However, non-verbal communication can be significantly important when two people want to discuss something very privacy. I am not implying that verbal communication is bad, but at some levels, it can have more disadvantage than non-verbal communication. Overall, both communications are like water and fish. They exists together as a companion in every individual’s life.