Interpersonal Communication

Communication is extremely crucial in daily life. When we can communicate the right information to another person, it will enhance the relationship between one another. What would happen if two people cannot communicate properly and cause misunderstanding?

Simple misunderstandings can, possibly, be best outcomes of any miscommunication. However, more than often, miscommunication can result in something more serious and threaten the very existence of the relationship between the sender and receiver.

Let’s look at a scenario. You were the C.E.O. of a company, and one of your employees, not only was late for work, but he also handed you an incomplete business report. His excuse was he had a bad weekend and he had to take care of some other tasks as well. Frustrated and angered by his disorganization and lack of devotion to your company, you quickly interrupted his continuous excuses for everything. Then you told him to get out of your office and clean out his desk by that afternoon.

From your perspective, you attribute his inability to perform at his highest level as the result of bad time management and inconsistency. However, what if the employee had a legitimate excuse for this action and you did not give him a chance to fully explain himself? Rather than his incapability, the task was incomplete because his colleagues at the company did not fully contribute in finishing the report. Therefore, as the group leader, he had to accept all responsibilities. This difference in your interpretation of why your employee was unsuccessful in completing the work is based on the attribution theory, suggesting that you strive to understand the causes of events around you in order to make appropriate responses. However, when you misinterpret and misunderstand the event, attribution can influence you to make a wrong response (Allred, 2000)[1]

This is just one of the many examples of how miscommunication can lead to the deterioration or, in this case, the termination of a relationship. This happens every day in our lives. Sometimes we quickly get angry and refuse to reason with the other person. Not only we jeopardize the relationship, but we also practice bad communication skills. By the way, this employee was the best worker in your company. Not only you were mad at the wrong person, you had fired one of your company’s greatest assets.

I find that we live in two different worlds each day: the first world is what we called home and the second one is anywhere outside of our home. It is interesting how I—hopefully everyone feel the same way—expect information in full details in the second world while only demanding less at home. Part of the reason for these differences is my family is very high context. We communicate less verbally. I always assume and hope that my parents can understand of what I want to tell them. On the other hand, sometimes it is hard for my friends and classmates to understand me because of my low verbally explicit communication.

I, finally, came to a conclusion that conflicts and misunderstanding are unavoidable. The most important thing we should all remember is how to manage them. Good conflict management skills can help us avoid unnecessary conflicts, and good communication skills can enhance our productivity and our quality of life.

[1] Miller, C. W., Roloff, M. E., & Malis, R. S. (2007). Understanding Interpersonal Conflicts That Are Difficult to Resolve: A Review of Literature and Presentation of an Integrated Model. In C. S. Beck (Ed.), Communication Yearbook (pp. 118-171). Lawrence Erlbaum Association, 118-159.